Maid in Abyss

Today’s deck is the Afro Brazilian Tarot.

This one reminds me a lot of the “neocolonial” tarot from a while back, but loaded with meaning that kinda escapes me, not gonna lie.

Venezuela neighbors Brazil, but because of the language there’s a bit more distance in cultural closeness compared to say… Colombia. Extra interesting to think about considering the amount of Portuguese diaspora in Venezuela.

Today’s reading had me a bit stumped. To charge ahead… with your curiosity leading the way… and then The Tower. “Charge towards your demise” doesn’t feel right… but then I remembered how The Tower can mean a revelation striking you out of nowhere. So it’s saying to charge towards whatever realization my curiosity takes me over.

Today I finished that one God’s Monsters book I started a while back and I really liked the conclusion of it. The ultimate point of the book in pointing out how nasty God can be in the bible isn’t really yo talk trash but to convey the idea that even people in the past were aware that life’s a piece of shit when you look at it so if there’s a creator it’s a really moody one. And that trying to justify God’s atrocities distracts from the kinship one might feel from people from the past trying to hold the unknowable providence accountable in some way for its bullshit.

I am dissapointed, however, that amongst the horrific powers God himself has in the bible the fact that his True Name (AKA The Ineffable Name of God) is basically The Ultimate Cosmic Slur and the fact that Lilith became a demon from saying it too many times goes unmentioned.

Now I gotta think what to read next…

Predictably after yesterday’s struggles, I spent all day today playing Custom Order Maid 3D 2.5… and how can I not after all the hassle of trying to get it running.

At some point I had to get a patch from their website and that fixed a random error but fuck me man, the Skyrim-esque allegations aren’t being beaten.

One detail I was remembering today was that when I first played it I was confused as to why the game put so much emphasis on the potential for NTR with the maids when, in my head, maids were just girls doing their job.

Now, ten years wiser (or dumber, given the subject matter) I know the answer. The core of the maid fetish, at least in the old school 2000s otaku way, is actually not that dissimilar from similar fetishes like sibling stuff or even childhood friends.

The core idea is that the subject is entitled in some way to the girl to facilitate the interaction. With a sister it’s the inherent familial connection being used, with a childhood friend it’s past feelings carrying over, and with a maid it’s that professional loyalty growing into something more.

If you’ve seen Kobayashi-san chi no Maid Dragon you’ve probably seen Kobayashi rave on about a maid needing to be dressed conservatively and so on and so forth. That’s part of it as far as I understand it (and I should emphasize that last part because it’s not really My Thing), the idea that, if anything, the girl is effectively saving herself for her master.

It’s actually wild how pervasive the maid fetish is outside of maid stuff. Any piece of media where the character (girl or otherwise) refers to the main character as “master” from vocaloid fanworks to mecha musume is basically drawing from that same general pool.

Understanding maids feels like when I finally understood why Arche in Tales of Phantasia being half elf was “bad”, in the sense that I’m glad I learned something but learning about the why and such behind things doesn’t make me exactly happier…

I also remembered the first CM3D had an April Fools that was a shooter and another one that was a fighting game with your maids and that was really cool.

I’m enjoying my time with COM3D2.5 (I better considering all the hoops I had to jump) but I’m playing it being aware that my attention will be taken away next week when NATSU NO SAKARI FINALLY RELEASES.

It’s the latest game of Miconisomi of After School Gangbang Addicts and Insult Order fame and I cannot begin to explain how long I’ve been looking forward to it. The game got announced in 2021 and bit by bit it’s been taking shape and it’s finally gonna come out.

And THEN Ushi Musume Maid no Milk Cafe is releasing on the 1st and man, took long enough for this year’s Good Shit to start trickling in.



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