Today I used the Pulp Tarot.
I’m in love. It’s not merely just really flavorful to its theme but it feels so thought out. It’s not enough to use the Waite imagery but to build up from what that imagery is supposed to represent.
It’s a bit like the Wives Tarot of a couple of days ago, but admittedly that one felt a little bit less serious, with The Emperor being a guy made out of cans and stuff.
Today’s reading is telling me to trust my intuition, and to approach logically those things that have me afraid.
Honestly it might be advising me that it’s better to focus on tomorrow’s trip instead of going to the doll event.
The Moon is interesting as a card because while there’s a million nuances to it like with any other major arcana, including feminine energy, intuition, start of consciousness, etc etc etc. My personal shorthand for it is: Thrive in the calm of the night OR be afraid of the things that roam the night.
You know, lately I’ve realized that this streak with Tarot and mysticism isn’t new (insofar as getting back into it three years ago I mean), in fact I’d argue that I’ve always had a proclivity towards magic as it were.
I unironically believed in Baby Jesus (that is: the Venezuelan equivalent to Santa Claus, bringing gifts) until I was 13 and I literally recoiled from the shock of that realization (or rather, the undeniable fact that it wasn’t true) for like a year. I also remember the 2012 prophecies and stuff really got to me.
So I’ve realized lately that it’s more like my rationality was hammered into me by just seeing “the undeniable facts”, and that whenever I do things like tarot readings and whatnot I feed that inner kid that wants to believe magic is real and rocks do have powers.
I mean rocks do have powers, a power proportional to how strong your arm is, but you know what I mean.
It feels like allowing myself to indulge in these things without the concerns of “I’m not crazy I’m just having fun” actually nourishes a part of me that I keep underestimating how important it is. There’s a specific joy for me in mysticism that I’m still trying to find the words to describe. Not to mention it keeps the creative muscles oiled in specific ways.
Another example is the fact that I tend to sometimes have vivid dreams with dead relatives or pets, and my mom has always told me that they’re visiting me when that happens, and that’s never felt… silly to me. Rather, I like the idea and I want to believe in it so I do.
And I guess that’s where I land on those matters in the end. If choosing to believe in those things leads to no harm I will.
In a way the only thing stopping me from being more religious is that I don’t like people telling me what to do.
But anyway, the title today comes from the fact that I was checking my balcony for some tools and the toolbox just… crumbled from UV damage. To be fair it was more the art supplies sort of toolbox rather than the SUPER DUPER PRO etc etc etc kind.
Only after I got back I remembered I’ve been meaning to buy a new frying pan because one had its non stick coating loosen and the other just had its handle go off the hinges. It’s kinda wild to think about the fact that if I buy one I would’ve gone through three frying pans since moving to Japan.
To be fair the first one I bought in like… Daiso or something? and the non stick coating got stuck into a piece of bacon. I could also keep using these for different things but you know… if I can afford a new one that’s enough of a flex for my Venezuelan ass.
I’m tempted to get a cast iron one, but nowadays I don’t cook that often so it feels like overkill. More specifically I love cooking but cooking for just one person means a lot of food goes to waste so I limit how much I cook or how complex the dish.
Beyond that I just spent the rest of the day making prep for the Hakone trip.
More on that later.