Today’s deck is The Final Rose Tarot.
A The Bachelor-themed deck, believe it or not. It tries to be Different with its minor arcana, but I immediately understood Roses were Cups so hey…
Continuing in the theme of the last few days, today’s reading elaborates that the thing I keep hesitating on is a fear that I’m somehow gonna step on other people’s feet despite being in a different zip code when I communicate.
Yeah, yeah…
I remembered to try the new glasses I bought yesterday!
They’re bigger than the other ones I have, have the UV coating thing, though being formulated means the crystals are lighter than proper sunglasses.
I put them on to get some groceries and completely forgot I had them on.
Later on when I’m making myself comfortable and taking off my shirt I also take off my glasses and get slightly spooked when everything looks… green?
The glasses have slight pink crystals, and my eyes just… got used to it, I guess.
I think they also block blue light? But I’m sure blue light isn’t literally blue light that you see. I don’t know, Blue Light sounds like that thing they said when I was a kid that watching TV destroyed your neurons.
My mind went to the family member I lost yesterday. The worst of the grief passed but you know how things go. Deaths make you reflect about life and whatnot.
On one hand I remember being frustrated that such a talented and creative woman went out in such an undignified way with a brain tumor that slowly paralyzed her.
But on the other my family did raise a good point that she spent a lot of her life looking after her mom and brother, and now when she needed care everyone paid her in kind and spared no expense to the very end.
This woman was one of the most creative and talented people I’ve met in my life. Anytime we’d check on her she learned some new obscure recipe, mastered some new handycraft, one time we checked on her and she learned to make homemade mayonaisse.
And I had started a new hobby just recently so it ocurred to me that the best way to honor her would be making wax seals for a bit.
I learned more in this batch. First of all: there’s a golden point for making these where the wax is still slightly soft but not sticky, that’s the best point to separate from surface and remove the stamp.
I also learned that paint powder is the best way to deal with intricate designs with lots of texture. This one feels obvious in hindsight because yeah, that’s how things usually go with weathering in Gunpla.
…I should try different colors but weathering-style and see how the wax reacts.
…I should build gunpla, it’s been a hot minute.
My mom told my aunt’s brothers about what I did to honor her and they loudly agreed it was something she would’ve loved and were moved by the gesture, a gesture made in private just as communion with memories.